sunday bower

 How soon this day has gone. After yesterday’s acts of mum’s manipulation with me, I had been leaded in the bower for the same deal as earlier. I tried to be indifferent and think less but it didn’t manage. I kept silence with mum and spoke in business tone. I buried earth and think that she never will be success in her business as she tried to have a finger in many pies but she can’t. I don’t feel myself as a rustic, but she particularly feels this. It’s interesting is she happy by these deals? Sometimes there’s no any bower at all. No shovels, no beds, no fatigue after this second job. But what will be then? What will she do in summer after work and on weekends? Will she really begin to travel, sew clothes for herself, go outdoors, mix with different people? I don’t know.

What I know precisely is I can’t live in this town with these people. After Macbeth audiobook it started an Adele’s song and I planged out reallity. Unwillingly I asked myself: “Who is that pretty man who download such a beautiful music?” Me. 

I had tired after I did my piece of work. 


4 thoughts on “sunday bower”

  1. “But what will be then? What will she do in summer after work and on weekends? Will she really begin to travel, sew clothes for herself, go outdoors, mix with different people?”

    That’s the scariest thing. It’s so easy to miss the point and forget for what one is working so hard.

    I think when the line of work ends up (it must!), a person is lost a little, doesn’t know what to do, has nothing to do at first and even feels bored. But after that comes “clear sight”, so to say, and he or she understands: “It’s time! I have something to enjoy and I may do it right now!” Time is a kind of remedy in this situation, too. One cannot start having fun at once, some time of “shelving” is necessary.

    At least, I hope it will go this way. Something like this story is happening with me. These holidays were coloured with a mood “Hey, why don’t you finish writing that story? You haven’t written anything for a long time, you said you had a bunch of interesting ideas. Almost all homework is prepared”. But I longed without any reason, as if doing university tasks was the only important thing.

    I still believe it’s quite possible to come back to thing a person wants to do.

    1. I think that the man may do what he wants only because of limitation of time. Somebody jast scares to make a step away from daily life. No any garantee that you will alive in your (not you of course) “free time”. You know my farther bought so much books on different themes for pension time. But no one will be read.
      I think it doesn’t allow to put life on shelf.

      1. A bewildering thing. Just yesterday I read a story of a robot who was speaking to his human friend about the time limitation.
        I do agree with you.
        Somehow, I remembered the words of “Gaudeamus”. They are “Our life is brief, soon it will end”.

        Perhaps the way out is that we can do both things at the same time, keep a special balance (so difficult to make it perfect!). I mean, we can enjoy the sky when we walk to work / classes, and the things like this. But unfortunately it won’t work all the time…

      2. I think religious made weekend for this reason, but somewhere we lost it. Although I often hear thinks what we speak about.

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