All day on work. Very liveless and sad. I was so distroyed yesterday that this morning I still felt like tears want to appear. So hard to move and do something. I was reading a book and printing some photo-orders. But actually there was no people for serve. At the start I quarrelled with an old man who tried to investigate our relationship. I passed myself together and said him all he wanted to hear “classical rabbish for buyers” – “you are absolutely right. Absolutely.” Dinner time I spent with a juice box. Finally after the most long ten minutes in my life I went to the street for a walk and met a girl whom I’d recognized not at once. She was standing in a door of DVD store and looked somewhere far. I approached to her and she with surprise recognized me too. But it’s impossible she said. That girl was my class mate in the first school. Sha has all (as I presume) for really good future. Rich mother – very success woman and father resides in Paris – she learned French, some time she studied in the best school of our Republic. But when her mother immediately died everything had collapsed. She returned to my first school and didn’t study at all. Her sertificate is a piece of paper but no more. At once work of a dream were found and she became a seller. So sad. But there’s a question of character’s strength. Plies of suicide and pessimism made her more sociopath. In seven years (I only presume) she tasted all alсohol, smokes, drugs and something else I think. But now there sad but stern voice shown me her like a resigned with her not fanny life.
I walked through street in sun beams and vivid shadows. Air. After four years in my college I understood so much thing artist must and not must to do. Last month shown me what mistakes I have done and not must to repeat them again.