This a simple placid day with pastime of painting. I’ve begun the self-portrait within legs with the blue background. Now as usual I dislike it and see many points to do tomorrow. Think less please.
As I had spoken before there are days when everything is precisely good. Inspite of rubbish of tomorrow’s (we never celebrated it in my childhood, really). But we will have supper with squids and new episode of documentary film. I hope so.
I feel power to direct my life better. Being not absolutely optimistic but pragmatic and dreamy I know that no other good life will come if I wouldn’t change my days and my mind. One shouldn’t hope for a good luck.
Strange enough but after dim weeks or months of hopeless existence among grey walls just a little crack of sun is able to light the all room. Sessions of Sherlock’s films and new Pozner’s documentary film let me feel a desire to live. I was treated my teeth and made some photo (something is better than nothing) and yesterday evening I imagined new composition for diploma picture. It should be worked up.
In this healthy condition I must to think up a weapon against the black hole of college. Something staight and rigid.
After so orderly morning with omelette for breakfast we went for shopping. About half of an hour we were going watching on dishes and tablet PC-es. Going shops and discussing different sides of purchases is a kind of delusion. It seems to you that everything may be bought. But naturally it isn’t true. Mom plunges into this delusion swiftly but I can’t wonder to and fro without curtain aim. Pretty things seldom touch me and rather seldom make me envy.
To change underwear so dainty isn’t my usual way. I used to run into the shop, fetch a model, try it and pay for. That’s all. But now I behold options. Softy pink.
Pizza and milkshake in the same old cafe where I was sitting so often long time ago. We had delayed at sport store trying winter jackets among other mad people who went there for sales. I had a good one but even with the sale too expensive. There is some plesure to watch on options of your look. To the end of time I felt tired with endless noise of music and stir of hangers.
Just a glass of juice at home nothing more.
The first junuary was to my surprise better than ever. As I get sleep after midnight there was no problem to wake up at nine and to go to the cinema after breakfast with my Napoleon. In the cinema hall there was enough people for the first year’s day. And then it began two with half hours of Celtic issue. Of course it’s the fairytale but it has some ground under action. Nothing comes from nothing.
In the cafe on the first floor we had pretty dinner. On the street it was snowing and very homely. A ginger cat run after people with feed and set in white show.
On the rink it came to my mind to compare rink with way of thinking. Enjoying round by round I always was under threat of people skating to another side. Chaos. But fresh air and physical entertainment was fun. Mom almost had learned to skating instead of her painful fall at the end of time. To disturb organisation I will say nothing. You what I mean.
On evening I was so physically and mentally tired that I was only drawing with colour pencils and watching Sherlock.
So pretty sometimes just to get sleep earlier and think. But you know when I begin to think it leads me to reflections. Now I distinguish of notion of life from another, I know that people often behave themselves one way because of nationality and mentality. Sometimes I suffer much with this narrow point of view as it is the second thing I think about person.
But this is not what I wanted to say. The first of Juniary was funny tranguill day of snow and light. Days of rest are so happy sometimes.