There had been dark-coloured winter dreams at morning until mom’s alarm clock rung. I got up immediately and obsereved our traditional breakfast in other condition. “Iron wall” is still here between me and mom. She plays this part in unskilful manner. Harsh tone of voice, ignoring of my advances etc. Very boring and laughful to watch at. I thought about it, of course, more. She’s my mom in fact. But to my own opinion her bahavior is a behavior of a victim of her own mom. She cannot to say her No. And being know enough about my grandma I could say that she is able to bewitch her own daughter. And then mom continues the wrong way she used with dad. Really this all the same situation he was in. Alike reactions and etc. I see in this one reason of coolness between them. This is why I am still not in angry with her actions. Although some warmth has emerged.
This void weekend was for some decisions about summer time. Curtainly I would like to spent time in warm expensive country with friends, but I can’t and nothing really bad is in it. I will spend time (hope so) on self-development affairs like new artistic methods or learning things I do less in usual time. My walk across the town today took me a notification about summer here. Maybe somebody thinks there is a town, but no, this is the huge mistake. During summer this town is a country. Streets are empty, people are out of here (or in air-conditioned offices), events absent, theatres are at vacation. And the list could be continued you know. But I should have been living in this town during two months after entering the istitute. I hope everything will be OK and I’ll do what I want.